Ten Things to Do to Ease the Pain of Divorce

Some divorces are simply nastier than others, and some are down right devastating. Whether your divorce was totally amicable or devastated you to the point where you could barely function, everyone who has been involved in one needs a little boost -- a little push toward getting back into the groove of living life.

First, let me say that if your divorce has left you depressed for an extended period of time, and normal life functions are difficult or impossible, please seek professional help. This article is in no way meant to replace formal therapy or care. That being said, let's get down to the ten things to do to get back on track:

Join a support group for divorce grief. Most church groups or synagogues have divorce grief support groups. Most of the ones I have been to are not affiliated with the place of worship and simply use the facility as a meeting place. I have been to two of them associated with the church, but there was no pressure to join the congregation at all. I had a good to great experience at all of them. Keep trying groups until you find one with a personality that fits yours. Associating with others who have recently been through divorce validates your feelings of hopelessness and fear; furthermore, most of them have access to self help literature that can be checked out for personal use.
Plan a short weekend vacation with a friend or relative who has that winning "life of the party" personality. It doesn't have to be an expensive or exotic location, just somewhere different with lots of things to do. Preferably, it will be a place you have never visited before and certainly not a place that was visited when still married to your spouse.

Take up some sort of fitness activity and engage in it everyday no matter what -- even if you can only muster enough energy for five or ten minutes a day. This could be brisk walking, jogging, tennis, biking, or just about anything that causes your heart to work a little harder. Somedays it will feel like drudgery making yourself suit up and go through with it, but once you get started, it'll be well worth it.