Ten Things You Never Want to Have to Say at a Chinese Restaurant

Honey, is this my imagination or did my last piece of rice move on my plate.

Honey, is the Chinese Restaurant having a live bar tonight? My sushi just squirmed.

Honey, do not go to the restroom, I just seen the cockroaches lug the cook in there.

Honey, I know a little Chinese, and I think the cook just asked if he could take the dog for a wok.

Honey, either my broccoli with chicken is somewhat slimy tonight, or the cook may have a cold.

Did your egg roll have a lizard wrapped in it too? Mine did, and I ate the other half.

Honey, my Kung Poo Chicken tastes like Poo Poo Chicken.

Honey, do not turn around, but there is a man chasing a live lobster with chopsticks.

Honey, have you tried the new Happy Cat Dish on the bar? ‘A cat squalls out in the kitchen.’

Honey, did you try the Seafood Delight, I think there is tentacle attached to your glasses.