Driving Men Into Bankruptcy
December 11, 2006 by
Prologue:
I am divorced. Domestic violence was an issue as were some other things I won't get into. He refused counseling, and refused medication and treatment for his diagnosed mental health issues.
When we went through our divorce, I did not ask for alimony though I could have gotten it. I knew it would be hard enough getting child support out of him, and I
felt it was my responsibility to support myself: not my former spouse's.
The child support amount awarded was relatively small, but there really is no way to make it fair to all involved unless the one paying it is extremely wealthy.
Even though I could ask for and get more, I do not. He has a family with 3 children to support and a wife. I have our child full-time with all rights.
I believe it is my responsibility to take the majority of the financial responsibility, since I have our child (by my choice) the majority of the time. To ask for more would only hurt 3 other innocent children who did not ask to be involved in this. Our child together is fine. I struggle to make ends meet, but we have always been blessed with shelter, utilities, clothes, food.
The Facts About the Cost of Raising a Child:
Studies have been done on what the actual cost is for raising a child. For most, the amount awarded in child support is not even close to half of what the figure is. The other side of it is that the one taking on the responsibility for having primary custody/care of them, logically, should also be willing to take on all that entails: including the financial responsibility.
The one paying the support usually struggles to make ends meet, as well. They are trying to support two households on one income. Nowadays most households have two incomes supporting their one household. See the dilemma here?
The ones who suffer the most are the kids. They go without and all too often they get to hear how they can't have or do this or that because 'that deadbeat is too cheap to pay the child support' or 'that bloodsucker takes all my money so I can't even eat'.
I am divorced. Domestic violence was an issue as were some other things I won't get into. He refused counseling, and refused medication and treatment for his diagnosed mental health issues.
When we went through our divorce, I did not ask for alimony though I could have gotten it. I knew it would be hard enough getting child support out of him, and I
The child support amount awarded was relatively small, but there really is no way to make it fair to all involved unless the one paying it is extremely wealthy.
Even though I could ask for and get more, I do not. He has a family with 3 children to support and a wife. I have our child full-time with all rights.
I believe it is my responsibility to take the majority of the financial responsibility, since I have our child (by my choice) the majority of the time. To ask for more would only hurt 3 other innocent children who did not ask to be involved in this. Our child together is fine. I struggle to make ends meet, but we have always been blessed with shelter, utilities, clothes, food.
The Facts About the Cost of Raising a Child:
Studies have been done on what the actual cost is for raising a child. For most, the amount awarded in child support is not even close to half of what the figure is. The other side of it is that the one taking on the responsibility for having primary custody/care of them, logically, should also be willing to take on all that entails: including the financial responsibility.
The one paying the support usually struggles to make ends meet, as well. They are trying to support two households on one income. Nowadays most households have two incomes supporting their one household. See the dilemma here?
The ones who suffer the most are the kids. They go without and all too often they get to hear how they can't have or do this or that because 'that deadbeat is too cheap to pay the child support' or 'that bloodsucker takes all my money so I can't even eat'.
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